Elementary School is Basically Karamja
Parts of it are peaceful—like the library, where everything’s orderly and quiet. Think of it like the beachy parts of Karamja, where you can chill and catch a karambwan or two. Or the mining area, where you can just swing your pickaxe and add gems to your inventory in relative peace.
And then… there’s the jungle.
The part where tribesmen randomly throw poisoned spears at you, snakes pop out of the brush, and you curse yourself for forgetting an antipoison. Every. Single. Time. Fairy rings? Not unlocked. Quick escape? Not a thing.
That’s teaching in an elementary classroom.
Trying to get through the day feels like completing a quest while running all over the map, paying full price for boat rides while hoping you don’t die and drop your whole inventory in the process. And when you do inevitably die? You respawn halfway across the world with no real way to get back to claim your items.
Enter the monster: We will call him-Jody.
Because let’s be honest—everyone’s known a Jody who’s a total tool.
Jody was stubborn. Like, quest-boss level stubborn. He slept through everything. Zero XP gained. And if you dared wake him up? Cue the evil face. Growling. Scowling. If, miracle of miracles, he was awake—he was ripping papers instead of working. Push too far? Welcome to Classroom Chaos: every single book off the shelf, on the floor.
And I’m not talking about some sad, single-shelf situation.
We’re talking wall-length. A fully and lovingly curated set of shelves. “No, David”, “If You Give a Mouse a Cookie”, “Oh, the Places You’ll Go”—all of it.
The places Jody he would go after his tantrum? Home.
But he didn’t know who he was dealing with.
Standoff? Bet.
Patience? Of Job.
Staring contest? Never back down.
If I say clean up? You’re going to clean up—on my time or yours.
Lucky for me, Jody’s dad was on the side of good (my side). He let me keep Jody stay after school to reconstruct my classroom book by book-as long as it takes. Eventually, Jody realized compliance was the only path forward AND not to make messes he did not want to clean up.
Fast forward five years: Jody now brags to people that I mean business.
You made it to the end — that's more than I can say for 3rd period today.
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